As you know from my last post, I struggle with issues that tend to consume me at times. This isn’t always bad, sometimes it is done on purpose so I can focus on being better. This is what I have been doing for the past three and a half months. Sometimes this can get overwhelming when it is combined with the struggle of everyday life. Not wanting to get out of bed makes it a lot harder to find the motivation to write.
By taking some time off, it gave me a different, better perspective on what we are working on and where we want to be at the end of all of our work. My headspace has cleared, and I can see what I need to do to get through it all. It doesn’t matter who you are, everyone is going through something, but that isn’t an excuse to be a shitty person.
It isn’t your fault, but it is your responsibility. Don’t let yourself loathe in your own misery, try and actively work on it.
One of the hardest things for me to explain to people is that I do know most of the time when I am slipping into that dark mindset again, I just can’t do anything about it. Those who have never been in this mindset don’t understand, and it has been something I have had to learn to handle and explain without getting angry. They aren’t closed-minded, they are just uneducated, and as someone who has these issues, I believe educating people who have never experienced what you are going through is one of the most important things you can do when you have a mental illness that impacts such a large portion of your life.
Cheers,
Bryant